wee davy
19th May 2011, 04:30pm
UNITED STATES IN A FRENZY
All over America (particularly New York), there are preachers armed with T-shirts, brochures, books and posters are preaching the end of the world, this Saturday 21st May. Using a complex numerical calculation (see below) from the Bible, there are even advertisements on the New York city subway warning of the "great earthquake" that accompanies the advent of Judgement Day.
Now, I don't know about you fellow GGDBer's - but I'm planning to have clean pair of underpants on!
Some enterprising aithiests, already have $35,000 dollars worth of business for the following service;
QUOTE
The post-doomsday pet rescue service already has 259 clients, who have paid $135 for the first pet and $20 for each additional pet at the same address, to ensure the faithful animal companions are looked after and loved even when their Christian owners have gone to the other side.
CalculationAccording to Genesis, when the flood occurred in BC 4990, God told Noah that in seven days he would destroy the earth.
If God's 'day equals a thousand years, 4990 plus 7001 years (the equivalent of seven days) equals 2011.
charlieboggins
19th May 2011, 04:53pm
I'll pop in the bank for a large overdraft tomorrow then and then look for the closing down sales, should be a few bargains to be had.
angel
19th May 2011, 05:00pm
I hav'nt heard anything about judgement day

on the American news here Davy, maybe it's another secret!
wee davy
19th May 2011, 05:10pm
Its been the recent subject of a documentary here, angel, and this was downtown New York, today
Don't you take the National Enquirer? lol
TeeHeeHee
19th May 2011, 05:19pm
Ah Davy, that's where one man's interpretation is another man's joke.
As a kid I always wondered about the 6 day creation (+ 1 day of rest) and how long must a day really have been for Big G. Then came such stars as Adam to Methusela who lived for hundreds of years which made me wonder if they had a different way of measuring years (like a dog's year = 9 human years etc.) but before too long I knew that a day is a day is a planetary revolution and a year is a year is an orbit round the Sun.
So what was all that about with the 6 days?
6 phases Davy.
1st phase? ... help a star to go into supernova condition.
2nd phase? ... New Solar system forms (let there be light)
3rd phase? ... Wee bit o' terra formin'.
... and so on till Adam (homo sapiens) leaves the woods (Eden) and heads out for the world's prairies.
See what I mean Davy ?
See these doomsday folks Davy, they've nae idea. Us weans worked aw that oot years ago.
See y' next Sunday mate; same time same place
wee davy
19th May 2011, 05:41pm
your place - or mine, THEE?
Rab-oldname
19th May 2011, 06:32pm
Its the wifes Birthday tomomorrow - any connection I wonder
Glasgow Girl
19th May 2011, 06:48pm
Que sera sera......
bilbo.s
19th May 2011, 06:48pm
QUOTE (wee davy @ 19th May 2011, 07:41pm)

your place - or mine, THEE?

Whit kinda bar is this ?
TeeHeeHee
19th May 2011, 06:51pm
Whatever it is .... you're barred.
beth
19th May 2011, 08:49pm
Naebuddy telt me here in darkest africa
glasgow lass
19th May 2011, 08:58pm
QUOTE (wee davy @ 19th May 2011, 05:41pm)

your place - or mine, THEE?

What kind'a perr are yoos two.
TeeHeeHee
19th May 2011, 10:09pm
Eh ... uhmm ... jist good friends; as folks say these days.
Anyway, it's nane o' yer bus'ness.
tamhickey
20th May 2011, 01:02am
Davy, see that street party your organising, is it BYOB? Oh, and what's the dress code?
wombat
20th May 2011, 01:11am

i get a brillyunt view of the planetary lineup where a ahm,an thats aw it is a lineup o planets no the end o the wurld,jist in case ah'v booked up a slab of beer at oor local waterin hole, and a bag of grass fae the local cops pal louie the lip
Dunvegan
20th May 2011, 02:11am
A' feel quite left oot o' things, nae end o' the wurld pairties, nae mates tae sing auld lang sang wi, ma wife says she's daeing nought special fur tea; yon American Christists hae a lot tae answer fur when it comes tae makin' a bloke feel bad about the morra's morn.
Crewsy Fixer
20th May 2011, 02:41am
I was rather concerned about "Judgment Day" as a youngster. God sees everything, Everything? yes Everything,
aw naw. Im doomed and Im only 12.
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 09:23am
QUOTE (wombat @ 20th May 2011, 01:11am)

I get a brillyunt view of the planetary lineup where a ahm,an thats aw it is a lineup o planets no the end o the wurld,jist in case ah'v booked up a slab of beer at oor local waterin hole, and a bag of grass fae the local cops pal louie the lip

All I'm gettin' is cloud cover
Talkin' about which, how's the Magellon brothers gettin' on. Will they be seen at your wee
soiree de groove.
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 09:25am
How was that for a planetary line up, Wombat.
Rab-oldname
20th May 2011, 10:46am
'Unless Camping is a raving lunatic' - well, they got that right!
http://www.jsonline.com/news/milwaukee/122270683.html
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 01:15pm
I was in the middle of diggin' the garden and came in for a breather ... but I think I'll spend the rest of the afternoon rapin' and pillaging across the border in France.
Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock ... The Appointed Hour Approacheth.QUOTE
After converting dates to our modern day calendar, we now know the heavens and earth were created by God in 11,013 BC, the worldwide flood occurred in 4990 BC, Jesus was born in 7 BC, Jesus was crucified in 33 AD, and in 2011 the earth will be 13,023 years old. The paper NOTHING Is More Important lists additional key dates in the timeline of history and provides information on how the dates were determined.
Many Christians have been taught that the earth was created in [b]4004 BC, but this date was not correctly determined from the Bible and it is not in alignment with archeological records.[/b]
charlieboggins
20th May 2011, 10:19pm
All I can say is that no wonder the banking crisis continued unabated, the world ends tomorrow and still not even an email about all the money I owe them and no demands to pay off the mortgage.
In the next world I'll use a different bank just in case, after all we don't want to start off in the next world the way we finish this one.
Another question, is it really worth trying to get a divorce tonight or will I let her get half the debt. Will there be 74 virgins awaiting us all tomorrow night, well for those of us that don't live in Airdrie? So many questions so little time.
benny
20th May 2011, 10:39pm
Aboot the only "end of the worlders" who hiv ever come close were the Jehovah's Witnesses. Charles Taze Russel, their leader, prophesied Doomsday sometime in the 19th century, but when that didnae work oot, he had another go an came up wi 1914. It wis certainly the end of the world for a lotta poor buggers, but not the whole Doomsday shebang. So, the prophecy wis revised again for 1975. Again, it wis a no show, so ah don't know whit the latest JW's estimate is, but ah don't think it's fur Saturday. Again, the JW's don't predict the "end of the world" as such, jist the end of the world as we know it. The world will still be here - but cleansed o the unbelievers an restored tae Garden of Eden quality, wi lions an lambs hivin a friendly kip thegither.
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 11:05pm
QUOTE (charlieboggins @ 20th May 2011, 10:19pm)

... Will there be 74 virgins awaiting us all tomorrow night,
I heard that the Muslims misinterpreted Mohammed's message there and that he really meant 74
vegans
Wonder what I should do durin' the next 11 hours ... probably spend half of it on here.
charlieboggins
20th May 2011, 11:10pm
jist the end of the world as we know it
That's annoying me, "It's the end of the world as we know it" comes from a song and I can sing the line but can't remember who or what song.Can anyone give the answer to that. Preferably before 6pm tomorrow as it will all be too late by then.
Now what other end of the world songs can we remember before we leave tomorrow
How about for those non believers....Don't they know it's the end of the world, it ended when I lost your love..... Can't remember who sang it but then my memory is slipping at the thought of Saturday night with 74 virgins, I'm hoping at least one will be female.
wombat
20th May 2011, 11:16pm
REM recorded it
charlieboggins
20th May 2011, 11:22pm
Thanks Wombat, now I can concentrate on hoping the virgins can speak English, don't want to waste my first Saturday night in hell asking 74 virgins to put more coal on the fire and all they reply is no comprende
Crewsy Fixer
20th May 2011, 11:24pm
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 11:25pm
....Don't they know it's the end of the world, it ended when I lost your love...
Brenda Lee?
Nae time to post a prize a suppose
charlieboggins
20th May 2011, 11:28pm
See the knowledge is in abundance so how about end of the world songs to see us out tomorrow. I have done two, surely there are loads more.
Your contribution will be duly rewarded in the Saturday night after life of tomorrow night.
TeeHeeHee
20th May 2011, 11:33pm
How about ...
"We're all goin' on a summer holiday ..." Do they play Cliff Richard songs in Hell?
What am I sayin'? Of course they do!
charlieboggins
20th May 2011, 11:42pm
I thought they played Cliff Richards songs here cos all I recall was everyone saying I wish he he would go to hell, we will find out the result of that poll at 6.10 tomorrow
wee davy
21st May 2011, 12:58am
The EndNitol

(Why did I KNOW this one would degenerate lol Your just not taking this seriously enough!)
TeeHeeHee
21st May 2011, 01:00am
Davy, give me the link mate ... I can't get that here.
Dunvegan
21st May 2011, 01:06am
QUOTE (Crewsy Fixer @ 20th May 2011, 12:41pm)

I was rather concerned about "Judgment Day" as a youngster. God sees everything, Everything? yes Everything,
aw naw. Im doomed and Im only 12.
Pray and get out more
Crewsy Fixer
21st May 2011, 02:11am
I dont pray Dunvegan, I chat to God and God is satisfied with my behaviour. I get 7/10 so far, room for improvement but.
Question for the posters.
If there is a Judgement Day and all is laid before you, how do you think you will fare, will you get into heaven or be told to beat it and go elsewhere.
TeeHeeHee
21st May 2011, 02:47am
QUOTE (Crewsy Fixer @ 21st May 2011, 02:11am)

If there is a Judgement Day and all is laid before you, how do you think you will fare, will you get into heaven or be told to beat it and go elsewhere.
If a condition of gettin' in is that you must have done something exceptionally brave and heroic, then I'm in ... just for standing behind Celtic's goal mouth ('64?) when big John Greg put away the only goal in the last minute - and I whipped out my Gers scarf and leapt over the wee wa' at Parkheid and high-tailed it to towards the Hun's side.

Nearly found out that day if there was a Heaven or Hell.
Chrissie
21st May 2011, 04:16am
You're lucky you got our of Parkhead alive, THH.
Not for a minute do I believe the claptrap about the end of the world. Just the same, in case there's a teeny bit of truth all of you have a real nice morning anyway.
Dunvegan
21st May 2011, 05:18am
QUOTE (Crewsy Fixer @ 21st May 2011, 12:11pm)

I dont pray Dunvegan, I chat to God and God is satisfied with my behaviour. I get 7/10 so far, room for improvement but.
Question for the posters.
If there is a Judgement Day and all is laid before you, how do you think you will fare, will you get into heaven or be told to beat it and go elsewhere.
As I am a Buddhist it wont apply to me. We judge ourselves and if we get it wrong we have to go over it all again.
wee davy
21st May 2011, 08:04am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BweCXILNe28There you go, TEE
(Good Morning everyone - hope youve all got those jobs done you 'needed' to get done lol)
wee davy
21st May 2011, 08:12am
bilbo.s
21st May 2011, 08:23am
QUOTE (TeeHeeHee @ 21st May 2011, 01:25am)

....Don't they know it's the end of the world, it ended when I lost your love...
Brenda Lee?
Nae time to post a prize a suppose

Skeeter Davis
wee davy
21st May 2011, 08:27am
QUOTE (bilbo.s @ 21st May 2011, 08:23am)

Skeeter Davis
Well done, bilbo - aye, yer right - av nae time tae go tae the shops tae get it! Then again, mibbes av goat awe the time in the wurld
bilbo.s
21st May 2011, 09:06am
wee davy
21st May 2011, 09:10am
Even better vid! Dig that crazy hairdo! lol
wee davy
21st May 2011, 09:12am
we have all the time?
bilbo - have you been given some inside info? lol
bilbo.s
21st May 2011, 09:16am
Aye, for it is written that youse christians are aw mental.
wee davy
21st May 2011, 09:21am
mental? menthol izzit? jist c'mere yoos, an stitch THAT! (bilbo steps back, stunned - haudin eez nose) LOL
bilbo.s
21st May 2011, 09:36am
Ma snitch? Ye must be a ferr louper fur a wee man !

Mind you, it is an easy target !
wee davy
21st May 2011, 09:42am
ach, its no the same as the real thing though, eh? nae reeling - sound effects 'n stuff lol
nae cheerin' and jeerin'
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